Well here it is, the last day of 2017.
Some might say "thank goodness".
Others are thinking "Finally!".
And still others quip "Big Deal!".
Personally, I can honestly say that I am looking forward to changing the year on the calendar.
Not because 2017 was so terrible. 
Quite the contrary.
I can't wait to keep the ball rolling.
I look forward to building upon the fantastic Journey that I am on.
I did take a quick look back at the "goals" I set for myself for 2017.
In general, a job well done.
I certainly have no complaints or regrets.
Goals for 2018?
I'm not sure yet.
Build upon 2017? 
Of course.
As the year came to a close and things actually quieted down a bit, I did experience a bit of an AHA moment.
SLOW DOWN!
When life speeds past me I lose focus.
I let little things go unaddressed.
One after another, day after day.
This is a sure recipe for a train wreck!
Maybe goal number #1 will be to remember to handle the little things.
It's amazing how much easier it makes dealing with life's adventures!
Shavua Tov!
And have a Happy and Healthy New Year!

This is the time of year when all sorts of lists pop up. The top 10 of this for the year and the top 10 of that for the year.The top news stories. You know what I am referring to.
Looking back at the year in review, I have a list of my own,one that provides me of a snapshot reminder of what was happening for me in 2017.
The list is my 12 Words of the Month. Here they are again chronologically:
January-GOALS
Feb.-RECRUDESCENCE
March-DIVINE
April-ORDER
May-DECENCY
June-PERCEPTION
July-DIGNITY
Aug.-EMPATHY
Sept.-ACCOUNTABILITY
Oct.-SERENITY
Nov.-FORGIVENESS
Dec.-TIME
As I stare at this list I had thoughts of a teacher handing out this list of words to her class and assigning each student to write a short story using all of these words. 
What might that look like?
For myself, I am having flashes of my own short story entitled "2017" and how these words fit into that story.
What was going on for me and with me when I chose each one?
How did I incorporate them into my life?
How have they impacted my life?
How have I done keeping them in my life?
What the hell is RECRUDESCENCE?

(a new outbreak after a period of abatement or inactivity )

And what new words will become part of my vocabulary in 2018?

The last part only time will tell. 

As for the 2017 list, as eclectic as it may seem, I can recount my short story of 2017.

It was a year filled with  challenges and choices.

It had it's ups and downs,it's highs and lows.

There was joy and there was sorrow. 

My heart was broken and it was lifted to new heights.
There were wins and there were losses.

If nothing else, it was a compelling short story that kept the readers riveted.

In a few short hours, I will find myself writing the inevitable sequel to this latest installment of the story of my life.

2018.....another banner year!

Shabbat Shalom!

Here we are the last How Am I Doin' Friday of 2017.
I imagine you are wondering how am I doing?
One could look back and say 2017 was yet another year of challenges. 
Deals went bad.
Promises were not kept.
Dreams went unfulfilled.
Weight was gained.
Failed strategies.
Money squandered.
Relationships strained and in some cases even torn apart. 
There were way too many funerals and countless numbers of setbacks.
In a word, it was a pretty normal year.
Every bad deal opened the door to a new opportunity.
Every broken promise led to new commitments.
For every unanswered dream there are as many new possibilities for the future.
My weight goes up and then I bring it back down....it's a cycle!
A failed strategy tests my resolve to find an alternate solution.
I am grateful to have had the resources to squander money and the opportunity to replace it.
There were babies born and new friends made.
It's all part of the circle of life.
(How Lion Kingish!)
So was 2017 a good year or a bad year?
Sounds like a pretty silly question.

It was a year, with 365 days.
365 opportunities to have a good day.
In the end,it comes down to 2 things, how I choose to show up and the attitude I bring with me when I do.
2017 
A really great year and a road that leads to many more .
Shabbat Shalom!

When we opened the Grooming Shoppe,we transferred our old home phone number to the shop.
At some point we switched service providers and ported over our old number . That was about 8 months ago.
Since then, every month, a charge appears on our credit card for $11.58 from the old provider.
I also get  monthly email alerting me to this bill. 
As I said, this has gone on for months. Today I decided to get to the bottom of this.
It's not a big expense, it just seems silly to throw more than a ten dollar bill away month after month.
I reached out to the old service provider and discovered that it was for two "additional" lines connected to that old service. 2 lines that have not been used in over 4 years.
Do the math.
48 x $11.58=$558.54
How stupid do I feel?
Well, not really.
I am sure we all forget to pay attention to trivial matters at one time or another. It's the compound effect of not paying attention that becomes more than just an inconvenience.
This is true of any habits or behaviors that we may not pay attention to.
 Like eating.
Or Exercise.
Or our personal finances.
Or house cleaning, yard work or car repairs.
Little things left unaddressed turn into big things given enough time.
I may have thrown away $558.54 however by making the choice to deal with this today, I won't waste another red cent on this.
Little changes that yield big results.
As the oft quoted David Spiegel has posed more than once:
Incremental is Monumental!
Chalk this one up as a win for the home team!

It's that time of year when I feel like every where I turn someone is talking about New Years resolutions.
Lose weight.
Get fit. 
Save more.
As if the changing of the page on the calendar will some how magically change ones destiny.
Well guess what....it doesn't work like that!
It was 7 weeks ago when I announced that there were 55 days left in 2017 and my plan was to finish strong. 
Finishing strong would guarantee that the year was a positive one.
Why is finishing strong so important?
I can answer that in one word....
MOMENTUM!
Those changes I hope for in 2018 started well before the ball drops on New Years Eve.
Wishing and hoping for success in the New Year is not a solid game plan.
It's farming 101.
If you want to have any chance at having a bumper crop, you must do the prep work.
The ground must be tilled and fertilized. 
The seed must be planted. And then on a daily basis the young crop must be tended to.
You could just toss some seed out the window and hope that it grows. 
You could dream about what a great crop will be like.
You might even pray that some divine force will cause the Earth to burst forth spewing a heavenly bounty.
Or you can get off of your butt and do all that you possibly can to help to achieve your goals.
I vaguely remember writing about this a year ago.
Goal setting is a far better plan than resolution making.
Unless of course you are determined to fail!
In which case, please disregard everything above!

This is how it happens.
First it's one "bad" day.
Then there's a new stressful challenge that appears.
The next day you wake up feeling less than exuberant so you kind of just go through the motions.
On day 4 you wake up and find that you have fallen behind on your work load.
You start getting uncomfortable with the log jam that seems to be creating on your desk.
In the meant time , your food protocols get sloppy.
You find yourself having a cookie or a dessert that you really didn't need.
The cookie or dessert becomes an extra snack and some extra carbs at dinner.
Now life is really getting out of control and time is at a premium.
Dinner? No time to shop....I'll just grab something at a diner or maybe a pizza place or some Chinese.
Everything is rushing towards Christmas day.
The whole world seems to be pointed in one direction and you are caught up in the tsunami that is carrying everyone and everything around you. 
A funeral and then another and then another. Time and good habits are slipping , no, running away.
Normal clothing is passed up for sweats They're more comfortable.At least that's what you tell yourself. The truth is, your clothes are getting a bit snug.
Still, just a few more days and this will be over. Things will calm down and life can get back to normal.
Then it's here.
Christmas morning.
Everything comes to a screeching halt.
No more running around.
No more shopping to do. No more preparation for the family gathering. 
all that is left is the reality of just how out of control you have gotten in such a short period of time. 
Years of hard work have been pushed aside and you find yourself standing on a scale staring at a number that you absolutely can not believe possible.
You stand in front of your closet and try to find an outfit that will look good.
You try on one pair of jeans that doesn't fit. Then another and then another. Before you know it you have a pile of clothes on the floor up to your knees, a testament to just how far you have fallen.
Despair sets in.
You feel defeated and disgusted.
It's time to choose. 
Continue to loathe yourself or choose to love yourself. Loathing is easier. You can just wallow away in self pity and continue down the same path right into the New Year. 
Loving yourself is harder.
Loving yourself means forgiving yourself and letting go. Then and only then can you start back on the road to recovery.
So here we are. 
The party is over. 
Time to pay up.
No looking back.
No feeling bad or feeling guilty.
Just pick yourself up and get your act together.
Again.

I know,it has been days since I have written. 
This was a matter of choice.
Time was becoming an challenge to me and prioritizing what I believed to be important meant making some very painful yet necessary choices.
My choice was less about not writing and more about tending to things that needed my immediate attention.
almost 5 days later, I can honestly say that I have managed to put out a multitude of fires and cross the vast majority of open items off of my to do list.
To say that I have made progress would be a major understatement. 
To sit back and admire all that I have accomplished this week would be an even bigger mistake!
Look, 48 hours from now, the majority of the people in the world that I live in will come to a screeching halt as they shut down for the long holiday weekend.
At some point during this respite in the mundane occurrences of our daily lives, I will find some time to sit back and take a deep cleansing breath.
I will be able to take a peek over my shoulder and see just how far I have come.
This is not that time.
Now is the final push. 
Now is the time to make sure that I continue my assault on that to do list.
Now is the time to not just reach for the top. It is time to go over the top!
Conquer the summit and find myself not just on top of it but on the other side of the mountain.
I do have to admit though....it feels pretty awesome so far!

The third snowfall of the season greeted me just as I began my afternoon run today.
As if Friday rush hour traffic isn't bad enough !
Did I mention that I live in Paramus N.J. , the shopping capital of the world, and it's a week before Christmas?
Well that might give you a clue as to how I am doing on this particular How Am I Doin' Friday!
Dinner is in the oven staying warm until every one gets here.
The table is set and I actually have a few minutes to reach out before we sit down at the table.
I'm kind of looking forward to some quiet time tomorrow. 
I have a plethora of items on my agenda that I want to address,almost all work related. I do have some personal stuff to take care of as well.
Hopefully, the stars will all be in alignment and I can plow through most if not all of them in the few hours I have to myself during the day tomorrow.
Part of the added pressure is that by midweek, I have the sneaking suspicion that people like vendors, customers and others will all start disappearing for the Christmas Holiday weekend.
Once that happens, it can be weeks before things get back to normal. And with the annual Halloween Trade show being earlier than it has ever been, mid January, there is not a whole lot of wiggle room left.
Did I happen to mention I still have to take another test for my CDL, before I can schedule my road test ?(which currently has a 3 month back log).
The website for my mandatory physical has been down for 2 weeks. When you call the help line the recording says "Our website is currently down. Please tray again later".
Not helpful at all!
Here's the deal..I can only do what I can do.
Period!
For now, I'm going to go and start pulling dinner together and enjoy a quiet Shabbat with my family. Sounds pretty good right?
Shabbat Shalom!

This time management thing is not getting any easier. Today we had snowfall #2 for the season and that absolutely threw me a curve ball. The County canceled their buses which adds people to my run.Driving was slow at best. Suffice it to say, by the time I got back to my desk today I have just enough time to check emails, send you a quick note, swallow a bit of lunch before heading back for my afternoon run.
Looking ahead, tomorrow is Friday and I never have any down time on Fridays.
Once again, it will be Saturday before I can try to catch up with all that I need to get done. Of course this Saturday I have the cleaning people in so that "quiet time" will not actually happen either.
And if my memory serves me, Becca asked me a while ago to try and keep my late afternoon open for this Saturday as well.
So is it that I have too much on my plate or have I not done a good job of allocating this resource?
Probably a bit of both.
However in any case, it is a) frustrating to me and b) not very effective for me.
I must get control of this situation. It is becoming untenable and quite frankly I am not enjoying any of it!
I am not out of control.....yet!
When and if I reach that point, I fear the carnage that will ensue.
Much lie driving a car, I just can't slam on the brakes here.
Perhaps witha few short taps and by taking my foot off of the accelerator, I can slow down enough to regain control before I careen off the road and crash into something!
I know that is what needs to happen. I know how to do that. It just feels very tenuous until I actually get back to smooth sailing.  

No I didn't fall off the face of the Earth.
And yes,it has been a few days since I last wrote to you.
Where does the time go?
I have no idea.
It just does. 
Go that is.
Saturday became Sunday,which became Tuesday and before I knew it , here I am on Wednesday.
Hump day as some refer to it. 
Half of the week is gone and I have not had one moment to myself since Saturday afternoon when Becca called and asked if I could help out at the shop.
Since then I have run from one task to another, with barely a moment to catch my breath , never mind find time to write or attend to the to-do list that I began tackling 5 days ago.
Which brings me to my December Word of the Month, the last word of the month for 2017:
TIME
The first definition that popped up for TIME when I Googled it was:
 A nonspatial continuum in which events 
occur in apparently irreversible succession
from the past through the present to the future.Key phrase being irreversible!
That is what makes TIME such a valuable commodity. When we approach the end of our days, rarely does anyone say, I wish I had more money or possessions or even friends. TIME is the one thing everyone wishes they had more of.
You can make more money. You can make more friends.
You can create more of anything,given enough TIME.
Still we take it for granted.
We waste it.
We under value it and over book it and generally abuse it.
Flat out, I am just not doing a good job at allocating his resource.
And that nonspatial continuum keeps going and going and going and going and going and going and going.......!

My week ended with a whirlwind of activity.
From about noon on Wednesday on it became increasingly obvious to me that the best I could hope to accomplish is to hang on until Saturday morning to regroup.
As my my plate filled seemingly by the minute, Saturday morning could not come soon enough.
I knew that with little to nothing scheduled for Saturday morning I could find the quiet time I desired to catch up on everything that was falling through the cracks.
Drop Susan at the shop before 8 and then the rest of the day would be mine.
Well it is now it's almost 10:30 and I am finally at my desk.
This is a full 2 1/2 hours later than I had imagined getting to this point.
Where does the time go?
A stop at the bank.
A trip to the grocery store.
With a funeral on Sunday to attend, the cooking for the Why Weight Holiday party that was planned for Sunday has now been moved to Saturday morning.
Just like that 2 hours disappear.
Today was supposed to have been a visit with a dear friend. 
We've agreed to move that to another date....I just don't know exactly when that date might be yet as I look ahead into 2018. January and week 1 of February are shot already.
I've yet to have breakfast and quite frankly there is very little in the house to rectify that situation.
I also have to bring Susan some lunch (pickings were slim for that as well this morning).
I did not get to meditation Wednesday evening.
  In fact while doing a "good deed" I ended up breaking a tooth.
Similarly, while attending a funeral on Thursday and fulfilling the mitzvah of covering the grave, I fell and my body is feeling the aftermath of that spill.
My Thursday morning meditation, which is taped, has also been put on hold. Hopefully I will get to it later today.
I have the start of a to do list on my desk. 
Presently it has 15 separate items listed on it.
The good news is I have accomplished at least 1 so far and when I hit "send' at the end of this email another agenda item will be off of my list.
We call that progress!
(oops, I just added another item to the list.)
1 step forward 1 step back..it's like marching in place!
The first snow of the season has just started falling.
This feels like a a message to me. 
Slow down.
Settle in.
And take advantage of the quiet that is all around me.
I get it!
Shabbat Shalom!

Busy day today and one in which I accomplished everything I had on my plate.
 That's a god thing and something that does not happen all that often.
Oh I imagine there are things i still might have added to my to do list, however,they were not on my radar screen for things that I wanted to get done today.
Tomorrow, of course, is another day and I can start a new list!
It is about 9 pm and I could probably take a shot at some of those "other" agenda items. But why set myself up for anything less than complete success.
Nothing , or at least very little will change between now and the morning. Instead I am choosing to quit while I am ahead and the day can be checked into the win column.
A good night's sleep and I will be ready for a fresh start in the morning.
I'm not even going to write out that to do list.
I know I have my bus runs and a funeral on the schedule already.
I kind of feel like time will become a valuable commodity and staring at an undone list all day will certainly set me up for anxiety and stress.
If nothing else, by day's end tomorrow, I will find the time to commit to paper all that is floating around n my World that needs my attention.
Once I accomplish that, I can then set about planning out just how and when I can tackle all of them.
Sounds like a plan to me!

 This morning I got up at 5,got dressed and then drove my brother into NY to the annual December Halloween Show.
This is the first time I have not attended this show in probably close to 15 years.
Things change.
Nothing stays exactly the same.
This is particularly true in business and painfully true in the Halloween Industry.
I had spoken to my vendors earlier this year and at my suggestion, they opted out of doing this show.
Any monies saved by not doing NY (and we're talking well over $0 K) could be used more effectively .
While I am both confident in my decision and glad to not be schlepping into NY every day this week, there is a touch of sadness when I remember what once was. 
Then again, what was was and what is is and what will be is .....well you know what I am getting at.
This has come up for me quite a bit lately.
My past has served me well. There are lessons that I have learned and experiences that I can draw upon that will aide me in decisions I make moving forward.
All too often, I sit and speak with people who pine for and live in that past history.
They speak endlessly of the "good old days" and mourn the fact that change has been thrust upon them.
Get a life!
The old days are gone!
Remember them.
Cherish them.
Have fond memories of them.
But move on!
Use them as stepping stones to tomorrow.
Use them as a foundation, building blocks, for what is to come.
 But for Heaven's sake, don't just cry over what will never be what it once was.
I am surrounded by this daily.
In business, in the riders who are in my care, with family members, friends and colleagues.
It's scary.
I have many many fond memories.
I have stories galore of the glory days.
I also have a burning desire to continue creating more and more of them. I suppose a time will come when I will sit back in my rocking chair and regale any one who will listen with my own tales of days gone by.
When that time comes, when there are no more dreams of tomorrow, when yesterday is the only happiness in my life, please do me a favor.....
remind me of this email!

Okay,so I know I owe you a Word of the Month for December. The truth is I just don't have one yet. I have been a bit preoccupied with the process involved in getting my CDL. 
Today I cleared 1 hurdle and found out that as annoying as I believed the process to be until now,it is actually even more frustrating and annoying than I imagined.
And there just ain't much I can do about that. 
With this new bit of information I now realize that all I can do is step back and allow the process to work its way one step at a time.
This will actually make things easier for me.
Much like the proverbial watched pot, there is little I can do to speed the process along.
I can now divert my energies to other endeavors and projects.
While the disappointment that accompanies this newly gained knowledge still stings greatly, it has allowed me to begin the process of regrouping and tending to other matters.
Once again I marvel at how raw the pain was earlier today and how I allowed myself to be in that pain, which ultimately allowed me to experience it and eventually move past it. 
"Pain is inevitable. Suffering is a choice!"
How often have I repeated that over the last 4 years?
Well one more time certainly feels right today.
I am actually pretty pleased and amazed with my ability to allow myself the opportunity to feel the pain, and then let go.
Maybe it's the meditation?
Maybe it's all of this personal development stuff I have been ingesting and digesting.
Maybe it's finally having a sense of self worth.
Or maybe it's all of the above.
What ever it is, it certainly is refreshing!
And oh so liberating!

The other day I shared this message seen on a billboard with you:
 " Do the right thing for the right reason" 

~Mathew 6 (1-4) (5-8)

It seems that this sentiment is also found in Jewish teachings as well:

"Be not like servants who minister unto their master for the sake of receiving a reward, but be like servants who serve their master not upon the condition of receiving a reward; and let the fear of Heaven be upon you"

-Pirkei Avot, 1:3

Again, a bit wordier than the simple message I see daily on that billboard ,however essentially the same thought. 

(Thanks Rabbi Weiner!)

I kind of hope that they will find a new quote to share with all of us who drive past this daily.

Some days I see it and it is really affirming to me.

Then there are other days when I find that I end up talking to myself saying stuff like

"okay I get it !".

And then there are those days when I am in a less than positive frame of mind and I end up asking:

 "oh sure and what does that get me".

You can only imagine the conversations with myself that I end up engaging in on days when that occurs.

Thankfully it is when I am in the thickest,most contentious part of that argument in my head that The Universe in its infinite wisdom places an opportunity to do the right thing for the right reason directly at my feet.

The inevitable outcome is I end up laughing at myself for ever having engaged in such silly thoughts at all.

Admittedly, when  make those right choices, when I do the right thing, I feel better about myself.

And that my friends is all the reward I could ever ask for. 

Shabbat Shalom!