Pissed off once again!

My day kind of got wasted today. I drove Susan to work early this morning. Sometime last night my son disappeared. I could tell my wife was uncomfortable with not knowing where he was so I drove by his friends's house to make sure he was where I thought he was. After an hour or so of texting I headed to the gym . I never seemed to get my day under control or take advantage of having nothing on my agenda.The void ,the not planning out my day, led me down a path I did not expect. 

My back was a little tweaked .My trainer asked me if I had done anything to it. I said I didn't think so, maybe it's stress related/

Little did I know how prophetic that statement was.

As I sit here writing the stress and irritation that has been building inside of me all day,is tightening the muscles in my back like a vice grip. My family is eating dinner and I have chosen not to join them (Chinese food...not on my diet).Instead I sat down to write. After a few minutes I decided to not write and I started to change the heading to Sunday February 21st.

As I began to shut down the computer I realized just how much more my back had tightened up once I made the decision to not write.

This is not good!

And the part that makes me most angry is that but for the inconsiderate actions of people I depend on to do their part, I would not feel this stress today.

I blame myself. I should have never put myself in such a position. They have no responsibility to me. I am responsible to myself and myself and for my self.

Now I am angry at me!

Again not good. 

And right now, there is not much I can do to rectify the situation.

Maybe early next week.Truth is, I believe that ultimately things will get worse before they get better.

Such is life.

So, there it is....I have now written. 

My back still hurts. 

The tension is still there.

And the stress is still mounting. 

But at least I didn't hold it in.

Shavua Tov!