Shuva and T'shuva

Of the many thoughts bouncing around in my head, the one that seems to be omnipresent is that this How Am I Doin' Friday is the Friday that falls during the Days of Awe, the 10 days of repentance that fall between Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur. Obviously this has some intrinsic significance to me. 
Should I be spending more time soul searching?
Are there relationships that need mending?
Have I offended anyone ,knowingly or unwittingly?
Have I let those I love know how much they mean to me?
Have I given thanks?
Have I expressed my gratitude?
Most importantly,have I been a good person?
Tomorrow is Shabbat Shuva, the Sabbath of return.Tomorrow's special haftarah reading begins with the words Shuvah Yisrael "Return O Israel", from the prophecy of Hoshea.Shuva/Return.
T'shuva/Repent
Since Shabbat Shuva falls during the Days of Awe, these two words and concepts are often tied together.
For me, it's simple. Shuva.....return. Return to being that person I know I want to be. 
T'shuva, repent, without self flagellation yet with honesty and sincerity. 
Asking for forgiveness, from those around me or from myself does not have to be a mournful outcry of despair. As I reflect upon who  I have been and what I may have done, I am confident that none of it was meant to be malicious,or hurtful or mean.
Have I offended someone?
 Probably.
Have I hurt some one?
Unfortunately, the answer to this is also yes.
Have I been neglectful, irresponsible,vain,overbearing,sarcastic, insensitive or inconsiderate?
Guilty of all of the fore mentioned and probably many other things as well.  
Yet none of it was intentional.
That is not to excuse myself.
That does not lessen the severity of the impact it may have had on who ever felt the lashes of my behavior.
All I can do,is ask for your forgiveness,and make the commitment to myself to return to the person I know I can be. The person who works diligently at being the best person he can be. 
Return to be gracious,caring, humble, understanding, helpful ,encouraging  and empathetic.
Return to being a good father, husband, brother,uncle, friend,coworker,confidante,and neighbor.
Return to being a better me.
I could have waited on this until next Tuesday, just before Yom Kippur. to address this. It has been on my mind for a while now. As I sat here preparing to write to you, I realized that the time was now, there was nothing more important or pressing to me .Being a better me starts with forgiveness.
 I ask for that forgiveness from you and from myself and pledge myself to continue this Journey to return to being the best me that I possibly can be.

Shabbat Shalom!