Change is Inevitable

 

I attended my first Halloween Show in March of 1996. Walking into the Rosemont Convention Center was overwhelming to say the least. At the time, I had no idea of the magnitude of this event. Row upon row of vendors, each one with multiple booths, spanning the length and width of the entire facility. Enormous barely describes what I experienced that day. In 1996, this show was dominated by independent and regional retailers, looking for the latest and greatest of what the manufacturers had to offer. Over the next few years, the show grew even bigger as did my opportunity in this industry. Happily I found my niche helping new manufacturers gain entry into the Halloween marketplace. Year after year, my team grew and grew. The Vasa Sales army would show up with a dozen helpers not including the nation wide network of independent sales reps that I cobbled together into what was at the time unprecedented in the industry. Alas, change is inevitable. Nothing lasts forever. Large national chains started acquiring smaller regional stores. 1 or 2 buyers now controlled what 15 or 20 once did. Independent retailers found themselves struggling mightily to hang on. Change was upon us. Like any good rollercoaster ride, the uphill climb would eventually lead to the whirlwind down hill race. All I could do was hold on tight and hope to not get thrown off the ride. In the end, that ride eventually came to a halt and I found myself sitting in a motionless car. The opportunities once afforded to me were gone. The ride was over. It was time to move on to the next ride. Yesterday was day 1 of this year's smaller version of what once was "The Greatest Show on Earth". The industry, and the Halloween show itself has survived albeit in a much contracted version of it's former self. Do I regret not being there? Not in the least. Do I miss the glory days of times gone by? Absolutely! More importantly, I am glad I had the foresight to realize what was changing around me and adjusted my presence on that landscape. Change is good! Painful at times but always a good thing!

Keep Telling the Stories! 2023

 "Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly."

 

Robert F. Kennedy

The start of week #2 of the new year. As I intimated in a post last week, 2023 has begun with a "quiet" start. And I don't mean in a good way. As I do every Sunday morning, I ran numbers for the week today. As expected, they were less than stellar. As this is the beginning of the second full year of being open, I now have the ability to look back and compare week to week year to year. No surprise when I looked grooming was down (significantly) and retail was up(pleasantly). In the end, week to week comparisons were basically flat which I suppose one could consider a god thing. One could consider not losing ground a positive. I am not "one". Moving forward does not mean walking in place. It gets me no where! The good news is, not having fallen backwards leaves me in a position to build with out having to recapture what ever ground we may have lost. Goals, or more appropriately, targets I had set for 2022 fell way short. The only real choice for moving forward is to reset. I can't magically just get to where I had hoped to be. Bemoaning shortfalls is an absolute waste of time, energy and resources. My focus is now on reevaluating and establishing new progress markers. These missed goals are by no means any kind of failure on my part. There are no coulda, woulda, shoulda's here. What is here is the opportunity to make some course corrections and add whatever is needed to my tool bag to make the positive changes I am looking for. Simple enough! I have no time to dwell in the cursed house of woe is me, other wise known as loserville. You have to love the fact that there are always lessons, and always opportunities to grow! Pretty cool huh! Shavua Tov! (which is how we say "have a good week!")

Keep Telling the Stories! 2023

"You can not do a kindness too soon, for you will never know when too soon will be too late"

 

-Ralph Waldo Emerson 

Things here at the shop are a little tighter than I would like (major understatement!). I can't put my finger on exactly why; the weather, the economy, a slow start to the New Year or more likely a combination of many factors. I am confident that this is a temporary, albeit annoying, turn of events, however it has left me a bit stressed out. My response to this was to have eaten a bowlful of obnoxious topped off with a healthy portion of sarcasm today. Admittedly, that's a very ugly way to be. It accomplishes nothing. Still, I haven't been able to stop myself. I am hoping that writing about it will allow me to see just how silly this is and move past this place I am wallowing in. Not that sarcasm is anything new to me. In my family, it used to be the primary avenue for communicating. I (we) have gotten much better over the years, however in times of stress, it is easy to fall back on bad behaviors. For some that means drinking, overeating or drugs. My opiate of choice is obnoxious sarcasm. Awareness is the biggest part of overcoming this pattern of abuse. Luckily, I am totally aware of how I am acting and will be able to stop quickly. In the meantime, I may just want to leave interacting with others on the back burner as much as possible.   Shabbat Shalom!

Keep Telling the Stories! 2023

 "There are a hundred valid reasons why something can't be done, but only one reason, Commitment, why it can."

Jonathan Lockwood Huie 

Responding to yesterday's email, a friend commented on the picture of the Keep Telling the Stories mug, saying "still my favorite mug!" My response back was "mine too!" I created this mug as my 2019 Holiday mug. It was inspired by a dear high school friend, at a time when life had landed some big blows on me. It was a message shared with my friend by his Rabbi and he passed it on to me, for which I am eternally grateful. So the message became a mug. Unbeknown the launch of my latest mug offering, our world would soon come to a screeching halt when shortly after the New Year set in, we found ourselves in Covid lockdowns. The message and the mug were quickly relegated to the back shelf as like everyone else, I found myself trying to cope with what was happening around me. A month or so into the lockdown, I lost yet another dear friend. His death fueled the spark that ignited the fire that indeed, it was so important to Keep Telling the Stories. The mug now became my mantra. At a time when human interaction was challenging at best, I found myself even more determined to Keep Telling the Stories. And not just repeating the same old stories, but creating new ones as well. My mindset became building upon the collection of tales that are the essence of who and what I am. 68 years on this planet has to mean something and sharing those experiences serves to preserve the meaning of why we are here. It's called our legacy. Keep Telling the Stories has been my mindset ever since. It is also my biggest dream, that someday Keep Telling the Stories might become a movement. I was watching a YouTube video the other day of Country Joe and the Fish at Woodstock. At one point the camera scanned the sea of humanity that was in front of the stage. All I could think of was imagine if all of those people were wearing "Keep Telling the Stories" t-shirts. Wouldn't that be something! For now, that dream will have to wait. For now, I'll just Keep Telling the Stories. After all, I truly believe that if you look hard enough, all stories have happy endings.

Keep Telling the Stories! 2023

Mourning

 The wake was on Sunday.

The funeral was Monday.

I didn't attend either.

To be perfectly honest, Rich was part of my life decades ago.

For 40 years I had virtually no contact with him.

Thankfully, we made the effort, along with Scot, and took the time to take a drive to Maryland and spend some time with our friend Tom, reuniting the Fearsome Foursome one last time.

Since then we stayed in touch via messenger.

Since his passing, I have had a number of people reach out to me offering their condolences.

In the wee dark moments of the night, as I lay in bed staring at the ceiling as I often find myself doing, I asked myself what it was that I was actually mourning.

What had I lost?

A friend?

I suppose.

Another fraternity brother?

Obviously.

Over the last 2 or 3 weeks, I have had a number of losses like this.

People who at one point in my life were very close to me, even if today I have little contact with them.

So why have these losses felt so devastating to me?

Why do my memories of them fill me with so much sorrow?

The unpleasant truth is my mourning has little to do with them.

My sorrow is the loss of me that I am experiencing.

Too many of these significant pieces of my life's quilt are falling off.

I mourn for the loss of the person I was.

I mourn for the loss of the person I could have been.

I mourn the loss of the person I never became.

I mourn the missed opportunities and unrealized potential.

I know that when I rise from this self imposed period of mourning, I will once again celebrate the life I have and all of those that are still a part of it.

Today, I still feel the sorrow.

Today I still mourn.

One thing I have learned over the years, the pain will go away, the memories will remain forever .

Keep Telling the Stories!

Fun!

 In the early stages of coaching training, peer mentoring was a way for us to put into practice the tools we were being exposed to. In an early session, the peer mentor I was working with asked me "what do you do for fun?"

That was 10 years ago and to this day I still do not have an answer to that question.

Fun just isn't something that concerns me.

I'm not sure where fun even fits into the conversation..

As far as I know, there is no Hebrew word for fun, so maybe it's not in my cultural DNA.

"Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.......:

No mention of fun.

I don't remember anyone having fun in bible stories.

Fun just doesn't resonate or ring any bells with me.

As I headed off to bed last night, I did however have this silly self satisfied feeling .

It came from having written yesterday.

It felt good.

I felt good.

There was a contentment to it.

Something inside of me felt better.

I felt back on track.

Purpose.

Probably a much more important word.

Having a purpose seems so much more meaningful than having fun.

By the way, the Hebrew word for that would be tachlit.

Shavua Tov!

Happy New Year

 Happy New year!

I hope this email finds you well.

I know, it's been quite some time since you last heard from me.

No excuses.....I just stopped writing.

After 8 years,4 months and 12 days, I found that I couldn't find it in me to open this platform and put words on a page.

I missed it terribly.

Still, I couldn't find a way to allow myself to write.

On Christmas eve, while scrolling through my cell phone, I realized just how many people I have lost touch with.

I will never have the opportunity to reach out to many of those names.

Too many ,way too many, are no longer here.

I think it's time for me to reconnect with as many as possible.

The picture above was taken on a visit with my friend Tom.

Friend, frat brother and as the photo depicts, a member of what was dubbed the Fearsome Foursome of the pledge class of Spring 1973.

Sadly, that group has now dwindled to just a Dynamic Duo.

One thing I learned from my musical past....I am not a good soloist!

It's time to strike up the band once again.

It's time for a reunion tour of sorts.

It's time to join the chorus again.

I don't make New Years resolutions.

I'm not big on promises either.

Life has a funny way of getting in the way of them.

I do however make commitments, to myself and to others.

My statement of commitment today is to reconnect. starting with this email.

There are no promises for a tomorrow. There is only the here and now.

So here I am, and now is the time.

I've missed you all!